Delaying ejaculation: simple, practical steps that actually work

Premature ejaculation can be frustrating, but you don’t have to guess what to do next. Some tricks work right away, others need practice. Below are clear, hands-on methods you can try alone or with a partner, plus when medical help makes sense.

Practical techniques you can try tonight

Start-stop method: During sex or masturbation, pause stimulation just before you feel you’ll ejaculate. Wait 20–30 seconds for the urge to drop, then start again. Repeat this 3–4 times before allowing ejaculation. It trains your body to recognize the build-up and delay it.

Squeeze technique: When you feel close, press the head of the penis where the shaft meets the glans for 5–10 seconds until the urge lowers. You can do this yourself or have your partner do it. Combine squeeze and start-stop for better results.

Change positions and pace: Positions that reduce direct stimulation (spooning, woman-on-top but with shallow movement) help. Slow down and focus on long, steady strokes rather than fast, deep thrusts. Short breaks or switching positions can reset arousal.

Use condoms and numbing products: Condoms reduce sensitivity and often add time. Over-the-counter topical anesthetic creams or sprays (lidocaine/prilocaine) briefly lower sensation. Apply to the head and shaft as directed, wait the recommended time, and wipe off excess to avoid numbing your partner. Test first to avoid irritation.

Exercises, mindset, and when to see a doctor

Pelvic floor (Kegel) exercises help many men. To find the right muscles, stop urine mid-flow once—those are the pelvic floor muscles. Twice a day, do three sets of 10 slow squeezes holding 3–5 seconds, plus 10 quick squeezes. Over weeks, stronger control often means better ejaculatory control.

Mindset matters. Anxiety, performance pressure, and quick arousal increase the chance of early ejaculation. Try breathing slowly during sex, focusing on your partner’s pleasure, or practicing mindful awareness to reduce racing thoughts. Talk openly with your partner about pacing and techniques—teamwork lowers pressure.

Medications: Some medicines are proven to help delay ejaculation. A short-acting SSRI (commonly prescribed in some countries for premature ejaculation) can work for many men when taken before sex. Other antidepressants used daily may also help. These drugs can have side effects and interact with other medicines, so discuss options with your doctor or pharmacist first.

If you’ve tried these steps for a few months and still struggle, or if early ejaculation causes serious stress or relationship problems, see a healthcare professional. A doctor can check for medical causes, suggest therapy, or discuss safe prescription options tailored to you.

Small habits and consistent practice often make the biggest difference. Try one or two techniques, stick with them, and keep communicating with your partner and doctor as needed.